My Out West Writing Adventure, Day 2
You know what's cool about hanging around with a whole bunch of writers? They all have really big vocabularies. And nobody looks at you strange if you choose a word from your working lexicon that is a little, well, off-beat.
You know what's not so cool about hanging around with a lot of writers? The creeping sense of mediocrity that can set in...a feeling of being mediocre in a world where mediocrity is a death sentence.
So, that's where I am today: enjoying the conversations between people who "get" the writer thing, because let's face it, few do, and yet floundering in a thick mire of inadequacy. Certainly, the critiques I got back didn't say "I'm sorry, but this really stinks." But neither did they say, "Holy frijoles, you are so awesome I can't see how you will be able to avoid selling 8 million books the first day you release."
It reminds me of the bible verse that tells us that we should either be hot or cold, for those who are lukewarm are worthy of little more than being spat into a napkin. It's clear, in my writing endeavors, that I'm not cold. That would be easy. I could just say, "Hoo-boy, I stink at this" and never give it another thought. But I think, on the spectrum, I'm a few shades warmer than that temperature you take a bite of and worry if perhaps salmonella has gotten a foothold in that particular buffet item.
I need to keep the goal in sight: work my tail off until my lukewarm emits an enviable plume of steam. Can I pull that off? I pray I can use this week to stoke that fire to its greatest possible intensity.
For now, it's back to class!
You know what's not so cool about hanging around with a lot of writers? The creeping sense of mediocrity that can set in...a feeling of being mediocre in a world where mediocrity is a death sentence.
So, that's where I am today: enjoying the conversations between people who "get" the writer thing, because let's face it, few do, and yet floundering in a thick mire of inadequacy. Certainly, the critiques I got back didn't say "I'm sorry, but this really stinks." But neither did they say, "Holy frijoles, you are so awesome I can't see how you will be able to avoid selling 8 million books the first day you release."
It reminds me of the bible verse that tells us that we should either be hot or cold, for those who are lukewarm are worthy of little more than being spat into a napkin. It's clear, in my writing endeavors, that I'm not cold. That would be easy. I could just say, "Hoo-boy, I stink at this" and never give it another thought. But I think, on the spectrum, I'm a few shades warmer than that temperature you take a bite of and worry if perhaps salmonella has gotten a foothold in that particular buffet item.
I need to keep the goal in sight: work my tail off until my lukewarm emits an enviable plume of steam. Can I pull that off? I pray I can use this week to stoke that fire to its greatest possible intensity.
For now, it's back to class!
Blogger ate my post! :P
ReplyDeleteI'm so excited for you this week, Becky. You may feel mediocre, but that is why you are there. You are striving to become the best writer you can be, and while it may hurt, you are doing Danae and Culduin justice through your sweat.
I always think of teh parable of the talents where the master leaves adn bequeaths his coin to his three servants and later returns to find what they have done with it. I want to be the first man! I want to be the one who invests wisely and works to give their best back to the master when that time comes, and while I'm totally mediocre now, I'm willing to bleed not to stay there, and I know for sure you are too or you wouldn't be in Utah, nor doing half the things you do. It will come. Even if you never sell anywhere close to 8 million. Keep at it and don't weary yourself with what you think you aren't! You can do it Becky!
I think we all feel mediocre (or worse) when we're with other writers. But its God that takes the mediocre and makes it great :)
ReplyDeletePress on my friend!