You know what's cool about hanging around with a whole bunch of writers? They all have really big vocabularies. And nobody looks at you strange if you choose a word from your working lexicon that is a little, well, off-beat.
You know what's not so cool about hanging around with a lot of writers? The creeping sense of mediocrity that can set in...a feeling of being mediocre in a world where mediocrity is a death sentence.
So, that's where I am today: enjoying the conversations between people who "get" the writer thing, because let's face it, few do, and yet floundering in a thick mire of inadequacy. Certainly, the critiques I got back didn't say "I'm sorry, but this really stinks." But neither did they say, "Holy frijoles, you are so awesome I can't see how you will be able to avoid selling 8 million books the first day you release."
It reminds me of the bible verse that tells us that we should either be hot or cold, for those who are lukewarm are worthy of little more than being spat into a napkin. It's clear, in my writing endeavors, that I'm not cold. That would be easy. I could just say, "Hoo-boy, I stink at this" and never give it another thought. But I think, on the spectrum, I'm a few shades warmer than that temperature you take a bite of and worry if perhaps salmonella has gotten a foothold in that particular buffet item.
I need to keep the goal in sight: work my tail off until my lukewarm emits an enviable plume of steam. Can I pull that off? I pray I can use this week to stoke that fire to its greatest possible intensity.
For now, it's back to class!